Last Saturday, outside of one of my favorite markets Target, I experienced something that had me crying on the drive home.
It happened last Saturday, at around 5:00P.M.. I had driven over to Target after first visiting my go-to Japanese market Marukai. I was planning to hurry through Target to get home on time to prepare dinner. While driving up to the parking lot, I noticed a young man standing in the middle of it with a box. In my subconscious I knew that there was chocolate in that box, and I very much knew he was trying to raise money with it. I drove a little farther than usual to park somewhere that was farther off from the young teen. After parking, I realized what I had done: I had purposefully avoided him so I didn't have to give him money. Guilt immediately followed, along with a fond memory of several scriptural verses that I read from the Bible and Book of Mormon. The verses asked to give to those who ask, to those who are in need without worrying about yourself. Through several experiences of practicing my faith in those verses in the past, I remembered that God had always provided for me when I give to someone in need. So the thought immediately followed, "What am I doing?" After that occurrence in the car, I stepped out and approached him myself to see how much his chocolates cost. He said $2.99. Having only $2 in my wallet at the time, I walked away with a promise that I'll buy a chocolate after doing my grocery shopping in the store.
Sure enough, after walking out of Target he was still there, selling the chocolate. I went to him and bought one chocolate bar for $2.99, the one he recommended. As I interacted with him during our chocolate sales transaction I noticed that his manner of speech was a little different, maybe a little slow. I sensed his nervousness as he looked away from me a lot. Something about him and the situation he was in made an impression on me.
Earlier that morning, as I scrolled through different photos online I asked myself, "What kind of photography do I want to show?" I knew while walking away from him, that this was something I wanted to show the world. With each step taken toward my car, a sense of relief came over me as I remembered that my camera was in the car that day. Before heading out to the markets I told myself to bring my camera because oftentimes I would see something that I wanted to capture but would feel disappointed because my camera was not with me, so that time I had brought it.
About a minute after this young lad says bye to me he sees me returning towards him. I wonder if that scared him at all, seeing this small Asian girl practically marching towards him. After explaining who I was and what I wanted to do, he, who we can call "J" allowed me to photograph him selling his chocolate bars. For the next 20 minutes or so, I saw how he would stand in front of Target, waiting, hoping that somebody would buy his chocolate. As this young teen stood there alone, I could only imagine the thoughts that ran through his head. "Would anybody really want to buy chocolate?" "Would they really care to help me raise money?" I were if he felt scared, if he felt lonely at all standing in the middle of a parking lot by himself. I saw many people walk purposefully away from J to avoid being approached by him. I also witnessed several people walk straight towards him to buy the chocolate, or even to just give him money. It was a pretty hot day; I felt the sweat on my body in the meager 20 minutes of standing around him. I don't know how long J had been there.
After getting the shots I wanted, I said thanks and goodbye to J. Then the drive home.
There was something about that situation that made me really want to photograph him, there with his box of chocolate. He made such a strong impression on me. On the road I thought about all the times I would hesitate to go out in the sun because I wouldn't want my skin color to darken. I remembered his skin color: dark brown. He must've been out there for hours. How foolish I am. I thought about how young he must be. I thought about how he was spending his Saturday working, working for his goal. He was learning the value of work that day. I thought about why he was in the organization. He must come from a situation that brought him to join that group. I thought about how I have always practically refused to work on Saturdays because I want it for either a date day or free day. He was willing to give up his weekend to sweat out in the sun selling chocolates to strangers in his vulnerable state, alone because he was trying to raise money to go to Six Flags with his group, his friends. I practically refuse to work on weekends because I want a free day. How foolish have I been. Having been working since my mid-teens, I've really come to value work because of all of the important life lessons I've learned from it. Many of us at his age may have had kind parents who would easily just give us the money to go to Six Flags. He worked for it. I could not help but think about how he felt, how he was battling fear with hope that day, hope that he can go to Six Flags. Tears welled up as I thought about the many life lessons he was learning that day, about the importance of working, interacting with people, about how to do business, about fighting fear with hope,
I used to be one of those individuals who would avoid giving money, feeling skeptic that the organization that I was giving to was fake, but that day I felt a little part of me change. Especially when it is a child who is clearly working for something, I felt that God will ensure that I'll be alright in financial terms even if I were in a financial pinch. I hope to be able to remember that short amount of time I've spent with J, because I saw something so beautiful that day. I learned something that Saturday. Maybe, hopefully I will remember those scriptures that gently brought to my remembrance the importance of giving back to God by serving his children when opportunities arise to practice what the scriptures ask me to do. It doesn't even need to be money that I give, but I know that giving what we have teaches me about the importance of life. I learned something invaluable that day, a piece of wisdom that you can't buy. But I guess for me it cost $2.99.
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It happened last Saturday, at around 5:00P.M.. I had driven over to Target after first visiting my go-to Japanese market Marukai. I was planning to hurry through Target to get home on time to prepare dinner. While driving up to the parking lot, I noticed a young man standing in the middle of it with a box. In my subconscious I knew that there was chocolate in that box, and I very much knew he was trying to raise money with it. I drove a little farther than usual to park somewhere that was farther off from the young teen. After parking, I realized what I had done: I had purposefully avoided him so I didn't have to give him money. Guilt immediately followed, along with a fond memory of several scriptural verses that I read from the Bible and Book of Mormon. The verses asked to give to those who ask, to those who are in need without worrying about yourself. Through several experiences of practicing my faith in those verses in the past, I remembered that God had always provided for me when I give to someone in need. So the thought immediately followed, "What am I doing?" After that occurrence in the car, I stepped out and approached him myself to see how much his chocolates cost. He said $2.99. Having only $2 in my wallet at the time, I walked away with a promise that I'll buy a chocolate after doing my grocery shopping in the store.
Sure enough, after walking out of Target he was still there, selling the chocolate. I went to him and bought one chocolate bar for $2.99, the one he recommended. As I interacted with him during our chocolate sales transaction I noticed that his manner of speech was a little different, maybe a little slow. I sensed his nervousness as he looked away from me a lot. Something about him and the situation he was in made an impression on me.
Earlier that morning, as I scrolled through different photos online I asked myself, "What kind of photography do I want to show?" I knew while walking away from him, that this was something I wanted to show the world. With each step taken toward my car, a sense of relief came over me as I remembered that my camera was in the car that day. Before heading out to the markets I told myself to bring my camera because oftentimes I would see something that I wanted to capture but would feel disappointed because my camera was not with me, so that time I had brought it.
About a minute after this young lad says bye to me he sees me returning towards him. I wonder if that scared him at all, seeing this small Asian girl practically marching towards him. After explaining who I was and what I wanted to do, he, who we can call "J" allowed me to photograph him selling his chocolate bars. For the next 20 minutes or so, I saw how he would stand in front of Target, waiting, hoping that somebody would buy his chocolate. As this young teen stood there alone, I could only imagine the thoughts that ran through his head. "Would anybody really want to buy chocolate?" "Would they really care to help me raise money?" I were if he felt scared, if he felt lonely at all standing in the middle of a parking lot by himself. I saw many people walk purposefully away from J to avoid being approached by him. I also witnessed several people walk straight towards him to buy the chocolate, or even to just give him money. It was a pretty hot day; I felt the sweat on my body in the meager 20 minutes of standing around him. I don't know how long J had been there.
After getting the shots I wanted, I said thanks and goodbye to J. Then the drive home.
There was something about that situation that made me really want to photograph him, there with his box of chocolate. He made such a strong impression on me. On the road I thought about all the times I would hesitate to go out in the sun because I wouldn't want my skin color to darken. I remembered his skin color: dark brown. He must've been out there for hours. How foolish I am. I thought about how young he must be. I thought about how he was spending his Saturday working, working for his goal. He was learning the value of work that day. I thought about why he was in the organization. He must come from a situation that brought him to join that group. I thought about how I have always practically refused to work on Saturdays because I want it for either a date day or free day. He was willing to give up his weekend to sweat out in the sun selling chocolates to strangers in his vulnerable state, alone because he was trying to raise money to go to Six Flags with his group, his friends. I practically refuse to work on weekends because I want a free day. How foolish have I been. Having been working since my mid-teens, I've really come to value work because of all of the important life lessons I've learned from it. Many of us at his age may have had kind parents who would easily just give us the money to go to Six Flags. He worked for it. I could not help but think about how he felt, how he was battling fear with hope that day, hope that he can go to Six Flags. Tears welled up as I thought about the many life lessons he was learning that day, about the importance of working, interacting with people, about how to do business, about fighting fear with hope,
I used to be one of those individuals who would avoid giving money, feeling skeptic that the organization that I was giving to was fake, but that day I felt a little part of me change. Especially when it is a child who is clearly working for something, I felt that God will ensure that I'll be alright in financial terms even if I were in a financial pinch. I hope to be able to remember that short amount of time I've spent with J, because I saw something so beautiful that day. I learned something that Saturday. Maybe, hopefully I will remember those scriptures that gently brought to my remembrance the importance of giving back to God by serving his children when opportunities arise to practice what the scriptures ask me to do. It doesn't even need to be money that I give, but I know that giving what we have teaches me about the importance of life. I learned something invaluable that day, a piece of wisdom that you can't buy. But I guess for me it cost $2.99.
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| It was a pretty hot day. He stood there on the right for most of the time that I photographed him. |
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| The parking lot. |
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| $2.99. Two for $5. |
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| Many times it seemed scary to approach the people. |
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| Many time they said no. |
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| But sometimes they said yes. Maybe even more than yes. This man approached him and asked, "You got change for a $10? I just wanna give you some money. I don't want chocolate." |
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| I ended up learning so much from that short 20 minutes, and he was doing all of the work. Thanks J. I hope you can go to Six Flags with your buddies. Masumi |
